Unplugged

Sometimes when I channel surf I see MTV's Unplugged on the grid and while I've never watched it, I snicker at the title. Just what are those freaks at MTV unplugging? I mean come on, these people brought us Jackass and that real world reality show, what's it called, lemme think, The Real World? Creative geniuses I tell ya, geniuses!! God only knows what they're unplugging or where they find these loosers who have no real world experience to speak of. I'm guessing there is something about these MTV shows that require a release form, a back-up supply of blood and some hair for a DNA sample. Nothing good can come from that, nothing good.

Anyway, today, I am officially unplugged.

Stop reading here if you don't want to know more 'cause lemme tell ya, you don't wanna know more.

Last week I was slightly bitchy, this week I've been way bitchy. It's all because I was full of shit, hence plugged. After some wonderful colace pills, a gallon or two of water, some extreme piratey vulgar language and many, salty tears, I'm no longer plugged. I'm unplugged.

So far, MTV seems to be uninterested in my unplugged story. I have no little dwarf or midget coming at me from the shadows to break my femur or bite my ankle, no one named Stevo appearing in a Tarzan thong to hang some sort of endangered lizard off my ear lobes to test me for pain tolerance and I doubt any bands will want to set up camp on my door step to play their latest and greatest rock song. I guess I'll just have to bear life being an unknown. Oh well, it can't be too hard now that I'm unplugged.