A to Z Meme (stolen from Bexxie)

A- Available or Single? Um .. TAKEN!! I'll celebrate my 17th wedding anniversary in May
B- Best Friend? Terra, best, longest, oldest
C- Cake or Pie? Peanut butter pie please!!
D- Drink of Choice? Water or Bailey's & Cream
E- Essential Item? Cell phone, it's not that I use it much but I need it for the clock!!
F- Favorite Color? Greeeeeeen
G- Gummi Bears or Worms? ewwwwwww
H- Hometown? Miami, OK
I- Indulgence? Getting my nails done
J- January or February? February, it's shorter and seems to go by faster
K- Kids and names? One girl, Kaitlyn
L- Life is incomplete without…? My kid, she completes me
M- Marriage Date? May 12th, 1990
N- Number of Siblings? 3, half sisters, Kindel, Kelly and Kristi, all K's
O- Oranges or Apples? Either really, I like both
P- Phobias/Fears? Heights, clowns, birds.... yeah, I'm a wus
Q- Favorite Quote? I don't want to think right now......
R- Reasons to smile? Hearing my kid singing to her CD player (she refuses to get an MP3 player)
S- Season? WINTER!!!!!!! SNOW!!!!!!!!
T- Tag 3 people? Tag? ... can I punch instead? (I totally stole that from Bexxie!!)
U- Unknown Fact About Me? Hmmmm, let me get back to you on that one
V- Vegetable You Hate? Beets, are they a vegetable?
W-Worst Habit? Popping my knuckles or gas, not sure which is worse
X- Xrays You’ve Had? Back, shoulders, neck, teeth
Y- Your Favorite Foods? shrimp, scallops, Italian
Z- Zodiac? Taurus

Forever and a day

That is how long it's been since I posted. Damn near two weeks. A long, long time.

Here's a run down of my boring life for the past two weeks.

The weekend before Valentine's Day, Miss Whineyhiney had a Girl Scout event in Pittsburg, KS. Bob decided to do our Valentine's celebration that weekend since she would be gone and we wouldn't have to worry about her or get a sitter. After we dropped her off at Friendship Fields (remind me to discuss this feeling later), we headed into town for dinner at Jim's Steakhouse. Jim's is an old school type steakhouse. Very expensive and very classic. We had to wait a bit before our table was ready so we retreated to the bar where we had a lot of things to raise our eyebrows at. The gay bartender (not that I have a problem with gays) was very entertaining to watch. I loved his mannerisms and just how he carried himself. Very different than what I'm used to. Amusing....... Entertaining........ The funny part though was when this old fart comes over and puts in his order and I couldn't tell you what he wanted but he specified everything from the type of vodka or gin to how many ice cubes and so forth. Then the barkeep proceeds to look up the recipe for this drink in his Boston's Guide to Bartending or whatever book he had on hand. I watched him (with great jealousy) as he skillfully and painstakingly prepared this delectable thirst quencher. The young barkeep had a brilliant gleam in his eye as he delivered his masterpieces to their table. Unfortunately though, just seconds after delivery, the old rat bastard fart who belted out the orders for his special drink bellied back up to the bar and demanded some other sort of glass for his cocktail. I guess the barkeep put them in a high ball glass when he should have put them in a martini glass. Whatever. I can drink wine out of a coffee cup just as well as I can out of a glass goblet.

After 2 beers for Bob and a Bailey's & Cream for me, we got our table. The menu was, as we'd heard, spendy (that's a Cruella word). Not Cruella spendy, but April spendy. Bob had another beer and we ordered a shrimp coctail. Yummmmmmm. Savory, giant, moist shrimp. Yummmmm. Bob ordered a steak that sounded bigger than my head and baked potato and I ordered an extra set up to share his steak. Our salads were not impressive, there was a beet on it rather than a tomato. A beet. I don't do beets. Our steak and potatoes came and Bob was excited, it smelled so good. I agreed that it looked and smelled good, but I just wasn't impressed. After the meal, the check came and I nearly fell over. We were charged for the sour cream for our baked potatoes, we were charged for the salad dressing on our beet accompanied salads, we were charged a beer tax on our beers. Fuck me. I'm surprised they didn't charge me to dry clean my napkin before and after I used it. Bob was pleased, said it was worth the dead president that it cost. I said, eh, whatever, let's just go. We headed towards home but detoured to one of the not-in-Miami casinos 'cause we never go there cause we always worry about leaving MWH at home. We lost...... I'll never learn.

The next day we went to have breakfast with my sister and her two amazing, adorable boys. I hadn't met my newest nephew Danny yet and I was sooooooo excited!! My sister is perfect, I couldn't ask for a better big sister, ever. My nephew Joey was a little hellion, he was tired and just didn't want to do anything. His pancake just sat there. I gave him his birthday and Christmas gifts and he seemed to warm up a little, but I could tell he was distracted and just didn't want to be there. Danny though, he was all soft and cuddley and cooing and the smell. Oh. My. God. The smell. I can't tell you how good he smelled. I could go on but this is going to be long so I'd better move on. The visit was short but good. I hope I can find the time and money to go to St. Louis this summer, just to do nothing but to get to talk with my sister and to get to know my nephews better (and my brother in law too). Time sucks though and the reality of it is that it won't happen, but God I hope I can figure it out. I deserve it, my sister deserves it and dammit, those boys deserve it.

After the quick breakfast reunion, we headed to Sears and back to Pittsburg to pick up MWH then to the famous sporting goods store so Bob could drool and home again, just in time for MWH to shower and pack for another sleepover away from home. She was going to spend Saturday night with some friends so Bob and I were going to have another childless night. We went to yet another out of town casino, lost our asses again and didn't do much the rest of the evening. MWH came home Sunday afternoon and no one really did much. Ah, the joys of Sunday.

The following week was par for the course, Bob worked over every night but Valentine's Day and MWH and I stayed at home and did chores. Boring. Yeah. Sad. Yep. Bob was off Valentine's Day evening so we did go out as a family and had a nice dinner. We went to the sucky El Mexicano restaraunt in town that always over charges. I hate that place, they should be shut down. Their food is good but the service sucks. I like the other El Mexicano place that is nice and doesn't over charge me until my eyes bleed.

This weekend was another lightning round in the Clark family whirlwind. Don't ask me what we did Friday, I couldn't tell ya. Oh, wait, now I remember!! I went to a Mary Kay party in Neosho with my mother! Before the party, we had dinner at a neat little chinese place that I know I'd never get to go to with Bob and we went to Cato's where I found some clearance pants that I can wear to work!! I actually have two pair of pants that fit me now!!! I even bought one extra pair a size smaller just cause they were so cheap. When we got to the party, we were the only peopole there at first. I figured we were a lock for the door prize but no, one more person showed and that one person freakin' won it. After the party, we went to Grove and gambled and lost our asses.

Saturday night we went to Buffalo Run's Coleman Restaraunt for a birthday dinner for one of my bosses. We had everyone there, the party was supposed to be for a mere 25 folks but it got so big we ended up adding to our table three times. There were a lot of people there. Some of the boss's friends are hilarious, I sat down at the opposite end between a few guys who drank a little too much and let me tell you my sides hurt from all the laughter!! We gambled and lost, drank and peed. Par for the course.

Sunday we got up bright and early and headed for Kansas City. Bob wanted to go to Cabela's and I had talked to one of the boss men and his wife and found some awesome places to go in KC. The boss man told me about The Plaza in old KC. It's like an outdoor mall, I had visions of Branson's Landing in my head, but I was totally wrong. It's bigger and grander and more everything. It's huge and not like a mall but more of an entire shopping and life experience. It was very neat how people were out walking dogs and socializing and just enjoying life. Very metropolitan, I loved it. We had lunch at O'Dowd's Little Dublin and oh. my. gawd. was it ever awesome!! We had the Wicksomething Wonton appetizer and they were fabulously creamy and perfect. Bob had the Bangers and Mash, MWH had Irish Stew and I had the Corned Beef Boxty. It was all amazing, simply fantastic!! I had a few bites of everything!! We walked a tiny portion of the plaza back to the Jeep and just had a great day.

I was off Monday. Off. Alone. No husband, no child. You'd think I'd relax and get to sleep in but you'd be wrong, way wrong. I stayed home and cleaned, ah, hell, who am I kidding, I went to the casino and LOST MY ASS yet again! Ok, now for those of you thinkin' I've got a problem, you're so wrong. LOL My version of losing my ass is losing the $10 or $15 I walked in with. I don't gamble big, I don't lose big, I don't win big. I just lose. Actually, I did do some cleaning, I dusted my entertainment center and my DVD shelves. I alphabetized all my DVD's and straightened up the whole mess I have had there for the past two months. And, if that weren't enough, I vacuumed the living room!! Yeah, I was tired, dawg tired.

Ok, so it's taken me two days to write this and I'm tired.

Happy Valentine's Day

Another year has passed and I truly never know what to expect on Valentine's Day. Some years I figure I'll get roses or a nice dinner out, other years I figure I'll be served with divorce papers. This year is/was no different.

It was roses.

I got a half a dozen of stunningly beautiful pink roses.

I guess he really does love me after all, or at least half of him does. LOL

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My friend Terra sent me this today and I got a good laugh out of it. It's kinda fitting for Valentine's Day (in an odd, bitter divorcee kinda way).

Are you tired of those sissy "friendship" poems that always sound good, but never actually come close to reality? Well, here is a series of promises that actually speak of true friendship. You will see no cutesy little smiley faces on this card-just the stone cold truth of our great friendship.

1. When you are sad -- I will help you get drunk and plot revenge against the sorry bastard who made you sad.

2. When you are blue -- I will try to dislodge whatever is choking you.

3. When you smile -- I will know you finally got lucky.

4. When you are scared -- I will rag on you about it every chance I get.

5. When you are worried -- I will tell you horrible stories about how much worse it could be until you quit whining.

6. When you are confused -- I will use little words.

7. When you are sick -- Stay away from me until you are well again. I don't want whatever you have.

8. When you fall -- I will point and laugh at your clumsy ass.

Send this to 10 of your closest friends, then get depressed because you can only think of 4.

Friendship is like peeing your pants, everyone can see it, but only you can feel the true warmth.

And always remember....when life hands you Lemons, ask for tequila and salt and call me over !!!

T.G.I.F.

Friday. Ah, let me say it again. F.R.I.D.A.Y.

Yes.......... *sigh*

It's after 3:00, I'm still at work (don't get off until 4:00) but I just had a melt down. LOL I've been working entirely too hard today. Entirely. Part of my job is to enter new (and old) clients into our software (TimeMatters) and to make their new files. Some clients, both old and new, have more than one matter (or case) so they may have more than one file. Generally each client will only have one attorney and since our files are color coded for each attorney, it's a safe bet that all of each client's files will be the same color. Confused? Ok, so I'm sitting here today entering in a new (old) client. This isn't his first rodeo, he's got a lot of files. So, for privacy, let's call him Billy Joe Bob. I enter Billy Joe Bob's info into the contacts and the matters areas. I calender his court date and link everything appropriately. I am waiting to make labels for his file so I just hang on to it cause I do the labels in batches. On Fridays though, I pull all the files for the coming week and I see that Billy Joe Bob needs to be pulled, his file, not anything else. Being the dilligent worker I am I'm confident that I know exactly where his file is and I go on...... I then sit down to finish labels and what not and realize I've got a red Billy Joe Bob file when I should have an orange one. I think I've screwed up because Billy Joe Bob is red and he should be orange or should he? Hmmmmmm, I have no idea. Then I panic and find that there is another orange file for Sammy Joe Bob that is in fact orange and he is in fact the one I should have been pulling all along. Oy vey. I think we should limit ALL clients from now on, one name per client and one client per name. Now that we have a Billy Joe Bob we can NEVER have another client with the name Billy, Joe or Bob.

***********************
On a pleasant note, my (paternal half) sister's (maternal half) sister had her baby Tuesday. (If I say my sister's sister people look at me funny, I do like my sister's sister, she's a great girl, but I can't claim someone who isn't really mine, although, I'll take her if she'll have me cause she's wonderful!) Johnna delivered a beautiful, happy, healthy baby girl. Welcome to the world MADELYN MARIE!!!!!!!!! Little miss cutie pie weighed in at 7 pounds and 4 ounces and was 20.5 inches long. I can't wait to see her!!!!!!!!!

*************************
On that note, the First Bitch just talked to the boss and he is telling us to get the hell out of the office, it's Friday!! Sooooooooooooo I'M OUTTA HERE!!!!!!!!!!

Who said romance is dead?

ROME (Reuters) - Call it the eternal embrace.

Archaeologists in Italy have discovered a couple buried 5,000 to 6,000 years ago, hugging each other.

"It's an extraordinary case," said Elena Menotti, who led the team on their dig near the northern city of Mantova.

"There has not been a double burial found in the Neolithic period, much less two people hugging -- and they really are hugging."

Menotti said she believed the two, almost certainly a man and a woman although that needs to be confirmed, died young because their teeth were mostly intact and not worn down.

"I must say that when we discovered it, we all became very excited. I've been doing this job for 25 years. I've done digs at Pompeii, all the famous sites," she told Reuters.

"But I've never been so moved because this is the discovery of something special."
A laboratory will now try to determine the couple's age at the time of death and how long they had been buried.

************

On the Today Show this morning, they said that they are speculating that the man was killed and the woman was sacrificed. Excuse me, hellooooooooo, I can come up with a much better story!!

I think that their village was attacked by bandits or pirates or whatever and these people were left for dead. In reality though, neither were dead. One of them (I'm guessing the man, I think the report I heard this morning said that woman had a head wound where he had had a chest wound) crawled to the other to comfort them and be with them to the bitter end. This truly sweet, sad but none the less sweet. Now, 6,000 years later, we can see true love. Or stupidity, whatever, it's a tough call.

WTF? @#(*&$)+#@

Why are some people just fuckers? Why do people say things one day and do the complete opposite the next? Fuck you, I'm sick of it. They ask for a favor or ask for forgiveness or tell you something in confidence and the next day they fuck you over, push you out of their lives, or just flat out spread lies around about you. Lies. I know there are two sides to every story, but come on, why lie so vehemently? If you're going to lie about me, make it something believeable, come on!! Sheesh!!

I love how people come to me to tell me their secrets then lie about me later. HELLOOOOOOOO! Idiots!!!!!!

I'm tired of the petty people out there, the ones who can't make up their mind who they are let alone who you should be to them. I guess I'm just a secret keeper.

Why do people have to be so mean though? What ever happened to courtesy and consideration?
***********

Ok, so now that I've bitched, onward and upward.

Last week was hell. Absolute fucking hell.

Tuesday, MWH calls me from school, she wants me to bring her something for her cold. I ask the school secretary to check her temp and sure enough, fever. I go get her, take her home and she's sick.

Wednesday, she's still sick. My poor beautiful red-eyed, crazy haired, sore throated baby. She's dying because she's missing school and friends and all of that good stuff. The snow comes it's beautiful out but she's miserable 'cause she's stuck inside. Bob and I go to Hell-Mart for meds and stuff and on the way home we get rear ended (and not in a good way) by some teenager from Commerce who's taking his girl friend home to E Street Plaza (low income housing). Luckily, he had insurance. I call the police dept for a police officer to write a report and the lady tries to talk me out of it, the dispatcher, not the E Street Plaza princess. I nearly fell over! Then the cop comes and he tries to talk me out of a report! UGH! HELLOOOOOOOO, do your fucking job! We go back to the police dept to write up the report and it takes freakin' forever. My neck, shoulders and head are starting to hurt...... Not good.

Thursday I take MWH to the AM Clinic where Dr. J. Twin tests her for influenza and sure enough she's pink. Pink means influenza. Lovely, my beautiful, red eyed, achey child is now an Ottawa County statistic. Caring Dr. J Twin tells me to stay home too even though I've had the flu shot, uh, no. LOL I laugh in the face of evil, I work for LAWYERS, man, nothing is keeping ME from work. LOL So I take MWH home, she's fine, pick up Tamiflu for her and Bob (no clue on his state of health, lol) and go back to work. I was feelin' a little achey but I thought it was the flu too but after I got to work and realized all that hurt was my head, neck and shoulders, it hit me that it was the wreck that was causing my pain, not the flu. My regular doc couldn't get me in so I went to the ER after work and had a slew of x-rays and tests done. Fun.

Friday Bob took the Jeep to get the estimate done and there is $1,000.00 worth of damage. DAMN! I love my Jeeeeeeeep, they are soooooooooo fixing it!!

Saturday and Sunday were a blur, I didn't get out of bed until 4:00pm Sunday I was so sore and achey. I still didn't know if it was the flu, a cold or the wreck. My sister and nephews (I'm so excited to see everyone) were supposed to be here this weekend, I haven't heard if they're here or not yet though.

Monday was back to school for MWH. She was soooooooo glad to get back too! For me, it was wild at work, non stop all day. I hurt like hell, I realized it was the wreck. My nose ran all day and I think I did have a little bit of a cold, sore throat, etc, but my pain was all around my neck and shoulders.

Today has been wild again, not as bad as yesterday, but wild none the less. I'm still tired, still achey and still sniffling snot. I'm leery of calling my sister to see if she's made it down from St. Louis, I don't want the kids to get this but damn it I wanna see them!!!!!! I also wanna know if Johnna has had her new baby yet (that's why my sis is here). I'm still tickled shitless that there is still some snow on the ground and they're calling for more this week, maybe.........