I thought (there's the first sign there'll be a problem) that 2007 sucked ass and that 2008 would be the relief I needed to get past such a sorry year.
But damn how I was wrong.
In December, due to the ice storm we had no electricity for 9, NINE, days. We had a small generator running the heat but we couldn't run anything else really. Heat and the bathroom light for 9 days. My life sucked. I didn't put up a Christmas tree. I didn't do anything to decorate. I could barely muster up enough strength to do anything. Our house suffered some damage too. A tree branch poked a hole the size of my head above our bedroom. Another tree branch brought down part of our chain link fence. We had limbs down everywhere and we only have 3 trees in our entire yard. It looked like a warzone. We lost everything in our deep freeze, refrigerator and top freezer. Nearly $1,000 worth of meat (Bob had gotten a deer and I had bought a ton of hamburger over the summer).
(I'm home now, hello Jose, my new name is Margarita)
So, ice storm, no electricity, no tv, no nothing but heat and a light in the shitter. Yeah, fun. NOT. I'm a true 80's child so SIKE or PSYCH is completely acceptable language here. Whatever. More margarita please........ Alrighty then....... Hey, Martha Stewart is funny......... oh, where was I? OK, no power, no Christmas tree, no money for gifts, yeah, life sucked. Anyway, Christmas comes and goes. Let's don't and say we did. And now it's 2008 and, well, it still sucks. The ice damage has to be fixed. We have yet another severe windstorm and my roof is shot. I have 3 layers of shingles ON TOP OF WOOD SHAKES. Hello, KY Jelly, please send me a dozen or so cases of your shit cause I'm about to take it up the ass in a big way.
The roofers come, two if by land, three if by sea (more margarita please) and give quotes. Bob and I weight options of faking our death for the measly $25K of life insurance (more margarita please) vs taking out a loan to get the roof fixed (WTF is wrong with my glass?, MORE MARGARITA PLEASE!!!!!!!!) Margarita salt...in my nose....... how did that happen.... just what is that stuff? Do you need to adhere it with lime or will water work? Oh, yeah..... roofers. Ew, some of them seriously need to bathe. And have dental work. Yeah, we pick a roofer who doesn't' need his teeth sandblasted and who is licensed and bonded. His crew takes only 4 days to annihilate my roof and throw the new one on. Amazing. Damn, thank God I have a backspace key to fix typos........ Mark Barone..... ya think he's a little light in the loafers? (still watching Martha Stewart) (more margarita please) New roof in 4 days. Ok, I forgot what I was saying.
Oh, the trauma of my life that could have brought me to tears last week (or was it the week before?) well, it's temporarily resolved. For now. We'll see what happens in a few weeks. Shit could hit the fan still but for now I won't be altering my life.
Hey, have you thought about putting those stupid, ugly, insanely expensive light bulbs in your sockets yet? I have. I've got 8 bulbs changed so far and all I have left is my damned ceiling fans and those are the expensive ones..... like $4 each bulb and there are 4 bulbs needed per freaking fan. Martha's over, now it's Jon & Kate plus 8, also known as the poster parents for birth control.
I forgot what I was talking about........
MARGARITA
Oh, roofers...... roof's done, damn good job, highly recommend. Broke, never be able to afford toilet paper again.......
I have more to discuss about the drama at school last Thursday regarding my precious, amazing, light-of-my-life, wonderful, perfect, amazing kid getting assaulted at school. Can't type now at all, the Jose Cuervo is kicking in too well but it's one hell of a story.
Hey, where's my glass...... is it immature to drink margaritas from a Shrek glass you got from McDonald's?
Monday, January 28, 2008
Tuesday, January 15, 2008
Life's Challenges
I'm not going into details here because it's not technically MY drama, it's a family members but I need to vent and I need to post here so here goes.
Every 2nd Monday of the month, I try to go to Owasso to a support group. It's for people who have had WLS but I joke that it's for AA. It's really for WLS people though so if I see you and tell you I was at an AA meeting, don't believe me. Three or four of us carpool down there to Owasso. It's in a wonderful, clean, pristine, new hospital there that is a great facility to have it at BUT it's in the middle of nowhere. The shortest way there is to exit at Claremore and drive about 25 miles on back roads. By the time we get down there it's dark and the roads are windy and I don't know where the hell I'm going so I'm ever so grateful to have my friends with me to tell me where to go so if/when we get lost it's not entirely my fault (I drive my friend's van). BUT, after my day this weekend, things changed.
We had a major upset at home and while I'm not going into details let's just say it's life altering.
So, I needed to get out. I needed the fellowship of my friends and I seriously planned on going SOMEWHERE. I did really want to go to Tulsa, the drive would have been very refreshing, but the location of the facility is hard for me and I found out that my other friends probably weren't going to be going. One was but the other wasn't and we take her van (one of the ladies who goes may be too large to fit in my Jeep). The hospital is not in an area I'm familiar with and I didn't want to end up in a ditch or hit a deer and be completely alone. So I didn't go. I should have gone but I didn't.
I had planned on leaving work early to help my daughter sell Girl Scout cookies but I didn't. I was too upset. I called her school and had them send her a note that asked her to go home with a friend for a little while. Bob had to work over (THANK GOD!) so I had the house to myself for a full 90 minutes. I sat down and cried. I started dinner. I cried. I went over my bills. I cried. I paid bills that should have been paid last week and the week before (I'm ahead, they weren't past due) but I didn't have time to do it. I cried. I unloaded and loaded the dishwasher. I cried. I washed the towels. I cried. I folded 3 loads of laundry that was left on the couch. I cried. My last chore was to climb a ladder and replace 5 incandescent light bulbs with the new energy effecient yet terribly expensive flourescent ones. You have to know though that I'm deathly afraid of heights. I'm 5'5" and I'm too tall if you ask me. If I fall it hurts. I should be shorter but I'm not. I should be swaddled in bubble wrap every morning before I set foot out of bed. So, after more tears, I climbed that damned step ladder and replaced bulbs. Once, twice, three times...... finally, on the fourth time I didn't need to hold onto a wall. The fifth one didn't get replaced because it was time for me to go get MWH but it's fine. I did it. I was up there at my own free will and by God I did it. I can do this. I am strong. No matter what happens in this situation, I'll be ok. We'll be ok. I can tackle that little blue step ladder and anything that comes my way.
Every 2nd Monday of the month, I try to go to Owasso to a support group. It's for people who have had WLS but I joke that it's for AA. It's really for WLS people though so if I see you and tell you I was at an AA meeting, don't believe me. Three or four of us carpool down there to Owasso. It's in a wonderful, clean, pristine, new hospital there that is a great facility to have it at BUT it's in the middle of nowhere. The shortest way there is to exit at Claremore and drive about 25 miles on back roads. By the time we get down there it's dark and the roads are windy and I don't know where the hell I'm going so I'm ever so grateful to have my friends with me to tell me where to go so if/when we get lost it's not entirely my fault (I drive my friend's van). BUT, after my day this weekend, things changed.
We had a major upset at home and while I'm not going into details let's just say it's life altering.
So, I needed to get out. I needed the fellowship of my friends and I seriously planned on going SOMEWHERE. I did really want to go to Tulsa, the drive would have been very refreshing, but the location of the facility is hard for me and I found out that my other friends probably weren't going to be going. One was but the other wasn't and we take her van (one of the ladies who goes may be too large to fit in my Jeep). The hospital is not in an area I'm familiar with and I didn't want to end up in a ditch or hit a deer and be completely alone. So I didn't go. I should have gone but I didn't.
I had planned on leaving work early to help my daughter sell Girl Scout cookies but I didn't. I was too upset. I called her school and had them send her a note that asked her to go home with a friend for a little while. Bob had to work over (THANK GOD!) so I had the house to myself for a full 90 minutes. I sat down and cried. I started dinner. I cried. I went over my bills. I cried. I paid bills that should have been paid last week and the week before (I'm ahead, they weren't past due) but I didn't have time to do it. I cried. I unloaded and loaded the dishwasher. I cried. I washed the towels. I cried. I folded 3 loads of laundry that was left on the couch. I cried. My last chore was to climb a ladder and replace 5 incandescent light bulbs with the new energy effecient yet terribly expensive flourescent ones. You have to know though that I'm deathly afraid of heights. I'm 5'5" and I'm too tall if you ask me. If I fall it hurts. I should be shorter but I'm not. I should be swaddled in bubble wrap every morning before I set foot out of bed. So, after more tears, I climbed that damned step ladder and replaced bulbs. Once, twice, three times...... finally, on the fourth time I didn't need to hold onto a wall. The fifth one didn't get replaced because it was time for me to go get MWH but it's fine. I did it. I was up there at my own free will and by God I did it. I can do this. I am strong. No matter what happens in this situation, I'll be ok. We'll be ok. I can tackle that little blue step ladder and anything that comes my way.
Tuesday, November 27, 2007
Happy Belated Thanksgiving!
The Thanksgiving holiday is behind us, or under our belt (ha ha, puns intended!) and I'm so glad that Christmas is coming! I'm ready for the cold weather that we're experiencing and simply can't wait for snow! December looks to be a rabid month. I have Christmas parades, my office party, Bob's work party, a trip to Kansas City to see an old grade school friend and to go shopping, a Girl's Night Out with my bestest and oldest friend from 3rd grade AND I have plans to go dress shopping with another friend! Dress shopping!? Seriously!!!!!!!!! Ok, maybe I won't get a dress but I will be getting something festive! I've got two holiday parties to go to so by God I'm going shopping!
Like an idiot, I did the Black Friday shopping in Joplin. The sales weren't great but I did get a few decent buys and I'm glad to have gone. Too bad Mrs. Coach wasn't with me or Zale's would be short one pair of 5/8 carat earrings. Maybe next year.......
Friday afternoon I got to see my amazingly funny sister, her super nice husband and their fantasticly awesome boys (MY NEPHEWS!!!!!!!!!). We had a wonderful visit and I really do hope we can make it to St. Louis for Christmas! I keep saying that and it never works out but dammit I'm going to try again!
Thursday, Miss Whineyhiney is getting her braces put on. That sounds scarey but so wonderful! It took me almost eighteen months but I got the money saved up for it and it's finally a reality! Sadly though, her trip to Washinton, DC, has been cancelled. I'm going to lose almost $200 in that fucking ordeal and I'm sooooooooooooo not happy about it. I'm so angry right now that words just can not express my fury. That's a lot of money and my refund won't be here before Christmas so I can't even use that money for the holidays! DAMMIT!
This weekend we went to Fayetteville and Rogers, Arkansas to go shopping. I am sooooo happy that we went! I found TWO new shopping centers that I freakin' adore and can't wait to go back to! First we hit the Northwest Arkansas Mall in Fayetteville. Which is a traditional indoor mall. We didn't get to crawl the whole mall but we did make a nice dent! I can't wait to go back and hit the other half! The second we hit was Pinnacle Hills Promenade in Rogers. This one is an open air, outdoor mall like the Branson Landing! They have a Williams-Sonoma and a PF Chang's!!!!!! YUM!!!!!!!!
This weekend, with any luck, I may be going back to Tulsa and I want to hit Utica Square! We'll see...... the parade is Saturday night so I'm not sure if we'll make it or not.
I have more to write, more to say, more to do but unfortunately no time.
Like an idiot, I did the Black Friday shopping in Joplin. The sales weren't great but I did get a few decent buys and I'm glad to have gone. Too bad Mrs. Coach wasn't with me or Zale's would be short one pair of 5/8 carat earrings. Maybe next year.......
Friday afternoon I got to see my amazingly funny sister, her super nice husband and their fantasticly awesome boys (MY NEPHEWS!!!!!!!!!). We had a wonderful visit and I really do hope we can make it to St. Louis for Christmas! I keep saying that and it never works out but dammit I'm going to try again!
Thursday, Miss Whineyhiney is getting her braces put on. That sounds scarey but so wonderful! It took me almost eighteen months but I got the money saved up for it and it's finally a reality! Sadly though, her trip to Washinton, DC, has been cancelled. I'm going to lose almost $200 in that fucking ordeal and I'm sooooooooooooo not happy about it. I'm so angry right now that words just can not express my fury. That's a lot of money and my refund won't be here before Christmas so I can't even use that money for the holidays! DAMMIT!
This weekend we went to Fayetteville and Rogers, Arkansas to go shopping. I am sooooo happy that we went! I found TWO new shopping centers that I freakin' adore and can't wait to go back to! First we hit the Northwest Arkansas Mall in Fayetteville. Which is a traditional indoor mall. We didn't get to crawl the whole mall but we did make a nice dent! I can't wait to go back and hit the other half! The second we hit was Pinnacle Hills Promenade in Rogers. This one is an open air, outdoor mall like the Branson Landing! They have a Williams-Sonoma and a PF Chang's!!!!!! YUM!!!!!!!!
This weekend, with any luck, I may be going back to Tulsa and I want to hit Utica Square! We'll see...... the parade is Saturday night so I'm not sure if we'll make it or not.
I have more to write, more to say, more to do but unfortunately no time.
Friday, November 09, 2007
Dreaded Sounds
This morning at 3:18am, I awoke to an unfamiliar sound. My daughter woke me up with the sounds of her wretching. She had never puked in her life prior to this morning. Seriously. She gagged once, but real vomiting had never happened before. I got her cleaned up and tucked her back into bed and about 15 minutes later she was making a bee line for the toilet again. Sadly however, she missed. She vomited every 30 to 45 minutes after that until around 6:00 am when, bless her heart, she passed out from sheer exhaustion.
I had lots of stuff to do at work today too..... Clients coming in to see me. Specific people I was supposed to call back this morning. Two divorces to fine tune and finish...... None of it will be happening now though.
My baby girl needs me......
I had lots of stuff to do at work today too..... Clients coming in to see me. Specific people I was supposed to call back this morning. Two divorces to fine tune and finish...... None of it will be happening now though.
My baby girl needs me......
Thursday, November 08, 2007
Popular Demand (and bribery)
My sister (the one who will kindly accept my kidney) has brought it to my attention that I haven't been blogging lately.
Here's me and my new friend Jason at the Murder Mystery. Jason was drunk, his girlfriend was with him the whole night, but we had a wonderful time despite her. LOL No, nothing happened, it was just hilarious! I love drunk people.
I don't have much time so I'll do some quick pictoral updating.
Here's me and my new friend Jason at the Murder Mystery. Jason was drunk, his girlfriend was with him the whole night, but we had a wonderful time despite her. LOL No, nothing happened, it was just hilarious! I love drunk people.*
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Here's me and my co-workers at my boss's Halloween Party.
My wonderful sister (yes, the one who will STILL accept my kidney or other live saving, vital organ) sent me some pictures of the two Bestest Nephews Ever but for some reason Blogger isn't cooperating with me on putting their pictures up.
So, what else have I done lately?
*My kid has turned 14. Let me say that again........ f o u r t e e e e e e e e n. It just rolls off the tongue. She had a sleep over and a separate "family" party. Tons of fun, really.
*I was dragged by chaperoned 4 teens to the Right Choices Corn Maze (yeah, I'm stupid).
*Bob went hunting in the Kiamichi Mountains (no, Bigfoot did not eat him)
*I had 5 days of peace and quiet while he was gone - OK, who am I kidding, all I did was run around like a raving lunatic and HAVE FUN!!!!!!
*I was dragged by chaperoned 4 teens to yet another Coleman Mystery Tour (yeah, I'm still stupid).
*I had two Pampered Chef parties and have booked 2 more!!
I know there are lots more things I have to blog about but I'm too damned busy, maybe later though, maybe later........
Wednesday, September 26, 2007
No, no, no, no, no, no!!!!!!!!
The Jeep is in the shop. They're replacing rear end parts that they replaced last year.
I saw a ginormous slug this morning as I was getting into Bob's truck to come to work. Slugs, they scare the snot out of me......
My printer at work is broken and Dell is sending me a new one. It'll be here Friday but now I have to use someone else's printer to print envelopes and labels.
I just burned my lip on my coffee. Ouch.
I just found my nephew's birthday card. His birthday party was Saturday. Shit. Happy (belated) Birthday Danny, Aunt April is a ditz who doesn't know how to put a sticker on an envelope and drop it in a slot.
Bob's truck is out of gas so I get to do that during my lunch hour. Joy, thy name is April.
Miss Whineyhiney has a math project on probabilities due tomorrow. Guess who'll be hot gluing dice and cards tonight WHILE cooking dinner.
Speaking of dinner, I had a brain fart this weekend and bought a waffle maker so we're having waffles. Why did I do that? Pizza Hut delivers perfectly good pizzas, sandwiches and salads, why did I bring in such labor intensive devices into my home?
Ok, I have to go now. I have a date with destiny. Watch for my full name to be mentioned on the noon news, you know, how they say "John Wayne Gacy" or "Orenthal James Simpson".
Yeah, today may be the day I snap. LOL Why couldn't I have just had ebola or some other disease that would have kept me in bed all day?
I saw a ginormous slug this morning as I was getting into Bob's truck to come to work. Slugs, they scare the snot out of me......
My printer at work is broken and Dell is sending me a new one. It'll be here Friday but now I have to use someone else's printer to print envelopes and labels.
I just burned my lip on my coffee. Ouch.
I just found my nephew's birthday card. His birthday party was Saturday. Shit. Happy (belated) Birthday Danny, Aunt April is a ditz who doesn't know how to put a sticker on an envelope and drop it in a slot.
Bob's truck is out of gas so I get to do that during my lunch hour. Joy, thy name is April.
Miss Whineyhiney has a math project on probabilities due tomorrow. Guess who'll be hot gluing dice and cards tonight WHILE cooking dinner.
Speaking of dinner, I had a brain fart this weekend and bought a waffle maker so we're having waffles. Why did I do that? Pizza Hut delivers perfectly good pizzas, sandwiches and salads, why did I bring in such labor intensive devices into my home?
Ok, I have to go now. I have a date with destiny. Watch for my full name to be mentioned on the noon news, you know, how they say "John Wayne Gacy" or "Orenthal James Simpson".
Yeah, today may be the day I snap. LOL Why couldn't I have just had ebola or some other disease that would have kept me in bed all day?
Sunday, September 02, 2007
Vacation, baby!
I'm home from Wyoming. We left Thursday, August 23rd I think. I know it was a Thursday. Bob's been sick for the past week and it's been very bad, very bad...... I can't tell you how bad. He missed work Tuesday, I thought we were going to have to go to the ER. We didn't but he missed work Tuesday, took off early Wednesday for an MRA (which I think they ended up giving him an MRI instead but we'll figure that out later) and he wasn't any better Thursday so he stayed home again. He should NOT have went on vacation but he did. He's ok now, sort of. This illness is weird, we don't know what sets it off or what helps it, it just hits, debilitates him and then as magically and mysteriously as it reared it's head it disappears.
So, here's a run down of our trip:
THURSDAY:
Bob didn't go to work again today, he was sick again so he rested and tried to sleep. Sleep is very hard for him, he can't unwind. Thankfully he was feeling not so sick by about 3:00 so I took off at 4:00 and we departed Miami at 4:30pm. I was smart and loaded the Jeep Wednesday night. This ain't my first rodeo ya know...... The drive across Kansas is nothing less than boring. Boring..... I hate Kansas (I'm from Kansas, born and raised there). We spent the night in Concordia, KS, I think. We should have driven on to York, NE, but for some reason we stopped.... Weird.
FRIDAY:
More driving...... Nebraska has little to offer in the scenery department. We stopped in Sidney at the Cabela's store. Bob was in heaven. MWH was in awe (again) at the mounted elephant they have in there, it really is cool. We all love the stuffed animals in the store, beautiful. We had lunch in the deli there at Cabela's and Bob had elk. Yummmmm. Back on the road, I got us lost near the Nebraska/Wyoming border. Ok, we weren't lost, we were on a road that was running WITH the road we wanted but at some point in time the roads split and I didn't notice. Both roads ended up at the same place but one was better and one sucked. We were on the sucky one. Bob yelled. I sighed. MWH just read her books. LOL We lost about an hour of time due to my little navigational glitch but we still got there. We crossed Wyoming in record time and arrived in Cody at 8:30 pm. What did we do when we got to Cody? Cruella and I went to Wal-Mart. Yep, I drove 1,100 miles to go to Wal-Mart. LOL Actually, their WM isn't all that bad, they've got more things than our store does and the tax is only 5% so it rocks. Tax was only 4% last year but they're putting in a pool in Meeteetse (about 25 miles south of Cody) and they raised the tax county-wide. Hmph, politicks.
SATURDAY:
We got up bright and early and headed to the main drag and for shopping! I went to the Wyoming Buffalo Company for some jerky for my office homies. LOL I got some souvenirs for myself too, I rarely ever do that...... I even got myself a beautiful sterling silver anklet at Greg and Sue's B-Dazzled... Again. Greg and Sue are friends of friends of ours (we went to a 4th of July party at their house a few years ago too so I guess they are OUR friends too and Greg resized my rings last year for free so he must really like me) and Greg just lost his leg in a motorcycle accident a few weeks ago. His son, Shawn, is watching the shop, he's a great jeweler too. I feel so bad for Greg..... he's such a sweet, sweet man.
After I bought the souvenirs, I mailed a care package to the office and we went to lunch at the Willow Fence Tea Room. Beautiful, elegant and very refined...... It's pretty much reservations only and it's off the beaten path so you've got to know about it. You don't just drive by and see it. The lady sells a million different kinds of loose tea and oh my god it's all so good! She has the best scones and devonshire cream! TO DIE FOR!!!! I wanted to bring back Butter Bells for my friends but she didn't have all the colors I wanted and I wanted a discount off the price because I was buying so many. I can get them online for less but I do like Loretta and wanted to support her but damn, I didn't want to be treated like a freakin' tourist! I didn't buy the bells there but I did find two different kinds (one marble one and one porcelain one) at Love's (a wicked cool kitchen store) and some mini crock ones at a store in Powell. I wish they had the bigger ones in Powell because they were exactly what I wanted to bring back...... but they were sold out. My luck! UGH!
SUNDAY:
Cruella & the ol' Coyote went to church so Bob and MWH and I went to town for breakfast at the quarter coffee shop (remind me not to go there again, it was ok, but not repeat worthy). We trinky dinked around town and drove out to the east gate at Yellowstone. Cody is about an hour from the park and the drive is beautiful. It's pretty much all Shoshone (translated: stinking water) National Forest and you're pretty much guaranteed to see some wild life. Sometimes black tailed deer, sometimes antelope, sometimes elk or moose and we even saw some big horn sheep once! Way kewl!!!!! We stopped at the Pahaska gift shop at the gate and looked around a bit, they have some boxer shorts that I'm seriously eyeballing.... Very funny drawers. This road goes through this town called Wapiti, I love saying Wapiti, I say it fast, three times. It cracks me up. Yeah, it doesn't take much. LOL
MONDAY:
Cruella and I headed north to Montana, big sky country. Billings, Montana, about 2 hours due north of Cody. The boys took the ATV's to Shell (about 2 hours away too but in a slightly different direction, northeast). Cruella, MWH and I hit the big city in due time. If you've never been to a Costco, it's an experience unlike any other. They are similar to Sam's Club but are a slightly cheaper on some things, their stock isn't quite as good as Sam's but they sell a few items that Sam's doesn't carry, like coffins. Yeah, when I die, could someone please run to Costco (there's one in Kansas City I think) and buy me a coffin so a particular local mortician who shall remain nameless doesn't defile me? LOL Actually, I'm totally joking, I want to be cremated.
Montana has no sales tax so people buy things in bulk. Major bulk. I kid you not I saw one family loading toilet paper and basic necessities in the back of a campered truck, when I first noticed them by there were about 7 flat bed carts full of merchandise (staple things like cereals, paper goods, two coolers, charcoal...), the man loading was deep in the bed of the truck, when I saw them again, all but one of the flat beds were empty and the man was standing outside the truck bed.
We went to Costco, Office Depot, Shopko, Target, Best Buy, Big K, Wal-Mart and I don't know where else. I did find me one super bargain I couldn't resist. I found two microSD cards for my and Bob's cell phones. Now we can download more ringtones and take more pictures and we can save them to the SD cards rather than bluetooth them. Sometimes I can't get the camera kiosk at Wal-Mart to accept the bluetooth, now I can save it to the SD card and be done with it! The cards are between $25 and $30 and I got them for $13 each! I love me a good bargain!! I loved Shopko, I wish we had one of those stores here! They are like an upscale Target, they have LEI (junior's jeans) and nicer stuff but at truly decent prices. I was impressed!! I also love, love, love the fact that Montana has no sales tax! Even Wal-Mart is OK if you don't have sales tax! LOL Actually, the Wal-Mart stores up here carry a lot of different things so it's really like a whole different store, sorta.
We got home and went to Zapatas for dinner, yummooooooooo! They have some mighty fine beans! I normally don't like beans but these were good!
TUESDAY:
We just hung around town and shopped, ah, to relax on vacation..... that's the good life!
WEDNESDAY & THURSDAY:
Wednesday night when we checked in to the Old Faithful Inn at Yellowstone, we heard someone say something about NBC's Tom Brokaw being there. Then, later, Robert and I went to the bar and this half Australian half Swiss man was cracking me up telling me (and Robert) jokes and he too said that Tom Brokaw was there at the Inn shooting footage for the Today Show. Robert and I walked around for a while looking for him but we never saw him.
We get up to leave the Inn Thursday morning, we were circling the parking lot so I could take a picture of the Inn from a distance and I said out loud "Darn it, I wish we could have seen Tom Brokaw!" and I kid you not THERE HE WAS!!!!! Not 15 feet from us!
So, big mouth me, I yell out of the window, "Hey Tom! May I take your picture?" (yeah, I asked and said "may I"). He replied back "I'd rather you not, once the cameras start for the day they never end" and he kind of sighed. I said back to him "Thank you anyway, I was just getting ready to take a picture of the Inn" and he said "Just tell all your friends we talked". There were a few other sentences of banter but that was the jist of it. He was very nice but looked like the park had kicked his butt already that morning. It was barely 8:00 am, if then, he looked rough. So, I did NOT take his picture then but as I was taking pictures of the Inn (which was truly my intent to begin with) I did get his back side. I have four other witnesses who can vouch for me, this truly is Tom Brokaw (he's got the orange parka and the tan pants). Tom looked very, very tired. He didn't have any make up on and his face was very blotchy (he had super red cheeks like me). He didn't look like he had a good night at all.
FRIDAY:
Sadly, this was our last day of Cody. Of Cruella & the ol' Coyote..... so sad.
We were on the road shortly after dawn. Yawning and gassed up, we headed south towards Colorado. The drive home was long and challenging. Colorado kicked my ass. Denver, Colorado Springs..... damn. I could write about it but I'm exhausted and it's just not going to happen. LOL
SATURDAY:
We hit home around 10:00 pm and wow were we exhausted. We drove through Dodge City and Wichita today, a very long day. I'm glad to be home.
So, here's a run down of our trip:
THURSDAY:
Bob didn't go to work again today, he was sick again so he rested and tried to sleep. Sleep is very hard for him, he can't unwind. Thankfully he was feeling not so sick by about 3:00 so I took off at 4:00 and we departed Miami at 4:30pm. I was smart and loaded the Jeep Wednesday night. This ain't my first rodeo ya know...... The drive across Kansas is nothing less than boring. Boring..... I hate Kansas (I'm from Kansas, born and raised there). We spent the night in Concordia, KS, I think. We should have driven on to York, NE, but for some reason we stopped.... Weird.
FRIDAY:
More driving...... Nebraska has little to offer in the scenery department. We stopped in Sidney at the Cabela's store. Bob was in heaven. MWH was in awe (again) at the mounted elephant they have in there, it really is cool. We all love the stuffed animals in the store, beautiful. We had lunch in the deli there at Cabela's and Bob had elk. Yummmmm. Back on the road, I got us lost near the Nebraska/Wyoming border. Ok, we weren't lost, we were on a road that was running WITH the road we wanted but at some point in time the roads split and I didn't notice. Both roads ended up at the same place but one was better and one sucked. We were on the sucky one. Bob yelled. I sighed. MWH just read her books. LOL We lost about an hour of time due to my little navigational glitch but we still got there. We crossed Wyoming in record time and arrived in Cody at 8:30 pm. What did we do when we got to Cody? Cruella and I went to Wal-Mart. Yep, I drove 1,100 miles to go to Wal-Mart. LOL Actually, their WM isn't all that bad, they've got more things than our store does and the tax is only 5% so it rocks. Tax was only 4% last year but they're putting in a pool in Meeteetse (about 25 miles south of Cody) and they raised the tax county-wide. Hmph, politicks.
SATURDAY:
We got up bright and early and headed to the main drag and for shopping! I went to the Wyoming Buffalo Company for some jerky for my office homies. LOL I got some souvenirs for myself too, I rarely ever do that...... I even got myself a beautiful sterling silver anklet at Greg and Sue's B-Dazzled... Again. Greg and Sue are friends of friends of ours (we went to a 4th of July party at their house a few years ago too so I guess they are OUR friends too and Greg resized my rings last year for free so he must really like me) and Greg just lost his leg in a motorcycle accident a few weeks ago. His son, Shawn, is watching the shop, he's a great jeweler too. I feel so bad for Greg..... he's such a sweet, sweet man.
After I bought the souvenirs, I mailed a care package to the office and we went to lunch at the Willow Fence Tea Room. Beautiful, elegant and very refined...... It's pretty much reservations only and it's off the beaten path so you've got to know about it. You don't just drive by and see it. The lady sells a million different kinds of loose tea and oh my god it's all so good! She has the best scones and devonshire cream! TO DIE FOR!!!! I wanted to bring back Butter Bells for my friends but she didn't have all the colors I wanted and I wanted a discount off the price because I was buying so many. I can get them online for less but I do like Loretta and wanted to support her but damn, I didn't want to be treated like a freakin' tourist! I didn't buy the bells there but I did find two different kinds (one marble one and one porcelain one) at Love's (a wicked cool kitchen store) and some mini crock ones at a store in Powell. I wish they had the bigger ones in Powell because they were exactly what I wanted to bring back...... but they were sold out. My luck! UGH!
SUNDAY:
Cruella & the ol' Coyote went to church so Bob and MWH and I went to town for breakfast at the quarter coffee shop (remind me not to go there again, it was ok, but not repeat worthy). We trinky dinked around town and drove out to the east gate at Yellowstone. Cody is about an hour from the park and the drive is beautiful. It's pretty much all Shoshone (translated: stinking water) National Forest and you're pretty much guaranteed to see some wild life. Sometimes black tailed deer, sometimes antelope, sometimes elk or moose and we even saw some big horn sheep once! Way kewl!!!!! We stopped at the Pahaska gift shop at the gate and looked around a bit, they have some boxer shorts that I'm seriously eyeballing.... Very funny drawers. This road goes through this town called Wapiti, I love saying Wapiti, I say it fast, three times. It cracks me up. Yeah, it doesn't take much. LOL
MONDAY:
Cruella and I headed north to Montana, big sky country. Billings, Montana, about 2 hours due north of Cody. The boys took the ATV's to Shell (about 2 hours away too but in a slightly different direction, northeast). Cruella, MWH and I hit the big city in due time. If you've never been to a Costco, it's an experience unlike any other. They are similar to Sam's Club but are a slightly cheaper on some things, their stock isn't quite as good as Sam's but they sell a few items that Sam's doesn't carry, like coffins. Yeah, when I die, could someone please run to Costco (there's one in Kansas City I think) and buy me a coffin so a particular local mortician who shall remain nameless doesn't defile me? LOL Actually, I'm totally joking, I want to be cremated.
Montana has no sales tax so people buy things in bulk. Major bulk. I kid you not I saw one family loading toilet paper and basic necessities in the back of a campered truck, when I first noticed them by there were about 7 flat bed carts full of merchandise (staple things like cereals, paper goods, two coolers, charcoal...), the man loading was deep in the bed of the truck, when I saw them again, all but one of the flat beds were empty and the man was standing outside the truck bed.
We went to Costco, Office Depot, Shopko, Target, Best Buy, Big K, Wal-Mart and I don't know where else. I did find me one super bargain I couldn't resist. I found two microSD cards for my and Bob's cell phones. Now we can download more ringtones and take more pictures and we can save them to the SD cards rather than bluetooth them. Sometimes I can't get the camera kiosk at Wal-Mart to accept the bluetooth, now I can save it to the SD card and be done with it! The cards are between $25 and $30 and I got them for $13 each! I love me a good bargain!! I loved Shopko, I wish we had one of those stores here! They are like an upscale Target, they have LEI (junior's jeans) and nicer stuff but at truly decent prices. I was impressed!! I also love, love, love the fact that Montana has no sales tax! Even Wal-Mart is OK if you don't have sales tax! LOL Actually, the Wal-Mart stores up here carry a lot of different things so it's really like a whole different store, sorta.
We got home and went to Zapatas for dinner, yummooooooooo! They have some mighty fine beans! I normally don't like beans but these were good!
TUESDAY:
We just hung around town and shopped, ah, to relax on vacation..... that's the good life!
WEDNESDAY & THURSDAY:
Wednesday night when we checked in to the Old Faithful Inn at Yellowstone, we heard someone say something about NBC's Tom Brokaw being there. Then, later, Robert and I went to the bar and this half Australian half Swiss man was cracking me up telling me (and Robert) jokes and he too said that Tom Brokaw was there at the Inn shooting footage for the Today Show. Robert and I walked around for a while looking for him but we never saw him.
We get up to leave the Inn Thursday morning, we were circling the parking lot so I could take a picture of the Inn from a distance and I said out loud "Darn it, I wish we could have seen Tom Brokaw!" and I kid you not THERE HE WAS!!!!! Not 15 feet from us!
So, big mouth me, I yell out of the window, "Hey Tom! May I take your picture?" (yeah, I asked and said "may I"). He replied back "I'd rather you not, once the cameras start for the day they never end" and he kind of sighed. I said back to him "Thank you anyway, I was just getting ready to take a picture of the Inn" and he said "Just tell all your friends we talked". There were a few other sentences of banter but that was the jist of it. He was very nice but looked like the park had kicked his butt already that morning. It was barely 8:00 am, if then, he looked rough. So, I did NOT take his picture then but as I was taking pictures of the Inn (which was truly my intent to begin with) I did get his back side. I have four other witnesses who can vouch for me, this truly is Tom Brokaw (he's got the orange parka and the tan pants). Tom looked very, very tired. He didn't have any make up on and his face was very blotchy (he had super red cheeks like me). He didn't look like he had a good night at all.
FRIDAY:
Sadly, this was our last day of Cody. Of Cruella & the ol' Coyote..... so sad.
We were on the road shortly after dawn. Yawning and gassed up, we headed south towards Colorado. The drive home was long and challenging. Colorado kicked my ass. Denver, Colorado Springs..... damn. I could write about it but I'm exhausted and it's just not going to happen. LOL
SATURDAY:
We hit home around 10:00 pm and wow were we exhausted. We drove through Dodge City and Wichita today, a very long day. I'm glad to be home.
Thursday, August 16, 2007
Photoblogging
Here are some pics of me in my younger years. The red ball pic is me at about 18 months, the red vest is about age 4 and the God awful brown dress pic is about age 5, kindergarten I think.
I figured I'd post these myself rather than some tabloid in the future, you know, after I win Publisher's Clearing House or become famous for mass murder.
Yeah, don't think I haven't considered it.
Sunday, August 12, 2007
Beauty Is As Beauty Does, Precious Peace, Blissful Baking, Pampered Chef Parties, Sadness Via Cell Phone and Painted Prettiness!
BEAUTY IS AS BEAUTY DOES
Miss Whineyhiney is a normal 13 year old girl who loves her hair. She has beautiful hair and I don't know where in the hell it came from. Blonde and straight with just a slight wave...... I'm so fucking jealous of her...... UGH! Anyway, Friday she got highlights and lowlights and damn it put 2 years on her. She looks so mature, so freakin' scary. Eighth grade is going to kick my ass. I know there will be boys, it's going to be a long, long year. I don't know how much highlights and lowlights normally cost because we go to the beauty college but let me tell you if it were much more expensive I'd have to sell one of my kidneys! OUCH!
PRECIOUS PEACE
Miss Whineyhiney has two best friends. One goes to her dad's house in Washinton for the summer, they stay in touch via email and cell phones. Her other best friend stays here but she is active in dance and has a different sleep schedule than MWH so they don't see each other either. She also stays in touch via email and cell phones even though she's less than a mile away. Ah, technology. Well, the Washinton girl got home last week and so this Friday night the girls got together and had their summer Girls' Night Out, their last big bash before school starts. FUN. So after the beauty shop makeover I dropped her off at her friends' house for their GNO. It does my heart good to see her happy, it's so nice that she has friends like that....
And, if my kid being happy (and gone) isn't enough, my husband went to Springfield on a little trip of his own. Yes, I was alone for an entire evening...... A L O N E Ahhhh, the words just roll off my tongue like.......like.......oh hell, there are no words.
BLISSFUL BAKING
So, no kid, no husband, what should I do? I baked. My 4th Pampered Chef party was Saturday and I was going to be demonstrating a warm chocolate cup cake recipe so I decided to make the recipe Friday evening so I wouldn't look like a complete and total idiot. It was so nice to have the house to myself, to be able to do what I wanted, when I wanted, where I wanted. To fart in peace with no one telling me to spray something........ Ah, heaven.
The cupcakes turned out beautifully and were to die for. I took some over to the girls, called a friend and had some foiled up for her and her son to take home and when Bob did get home he ate one or two (or three). They were good. Rich, chocolate, coffee and cream...... Have mercy!
PAMPERED CHEF PARTIES
Thursday I closed my third party, a catalog show, and Saturday I did my fourth show, a cooking show. I get entirely too excited about these stupid shows. I drag every Pampered Chef thing I own to them and I'm thinking that my Jeep just isn't big enough. I really do have a great time though, it's just so damned fun! I would LOVE to do it full time but I don't sell well, I just love to do it. LOL I know it's expensive, but I love the gadgets, I just do it for me and no one else. My goal is 2 shows a month and I've met my goal this month already so I guess I'm done. We'll see though...... I do have one scheduled for September and one for October already so I am booking up fast!! WOO HOO!
SADNESS VIA CELL PHONE
Mrs. Coach's precious grandma is having some major health concerns. Mrs. C has been texting me all weekend keeping me informed about her status. It ain't good people, if you believe in God, please, please pray. Pray for Grandma and pray for Mrs. C and her family. They're good people, I hate that she's feelin' pain.
PAINTED PRETTINESS
It's taken two months but my office is finally complete! Bob hung my shelf today so I could move the book case and other furniture around and I love it! WOO HOO! He finished the painting behind the book case and took down the ugly blinds so now my office is beautiful and done! I think I'll find some pretty art work and maybe a mirror or a clock for decorations but the major stuff is done! Finally! It's all mine and I love it!!!!!!
*******************************************************
Tomorrow starts the new week and I'm not sure this weekend was long enough. Actually I'm positive it wasn't long enough. I can't complain though because I did what I wanted to, I just wanted to do more than what I had time for. Ah, life.
Miss Whineyhiney is a normal 13 year old girl who loves her hair. She has beautiful hair and I don't know where in the hell it came from. Blonde and straight with just a slight wave...... I'm so fucking jealous of her...... UGH! Anyway, Friday she got highlights and lowlights and damn it put 2 years on her. She looks so mature, so freakin' scary. Eighth grade is going to kick my ass. I know there will be boys, it's going to be a long, long year. I don't know how much highlights and lowlights normally cost because we go to the beauty college but let me tell you if it were much more expensive I'd have to sell one of my kidneys! OUCH!
PRECIOUS PEACE
Miss Whineyhiney has two best friends. One goes to her dad's house in Washinton for the summer, they stay in touch via email and cell phones. Her other best friend stays here but she is active in dance and has a different sleep schedule than MWH so they don't see each other either. She also stays in touch via email and cell phones even though she's less than a mile away. Ah, technology. Well, the Washinton girl got home last week and so this Friday night the girls got together and had their summer Girls' Night Out, their last big bash before school starts. FUN. So after the beauty shop makeover I dropped her off at her friends' house for their GNO. It does my heart good to see her happy, it's so nice that she has friends like that....
And, if my kid being happy (and gone) isn't enough, my husband went to Springfield on a little trip of his own. Yes, I was alone for an entire evening...... A L O N E Ahhhh, the words just roll off my tongue like.......like.......oh hell, there are no words.
BLISSFUL BAKING
So, no kid, no husband, what should I do? I baked. My 4th Pampered Chef party was Saturday and I was going to be demonstrating a warm chocolate cup cake recipe so I decided to make the recipe Friday evening so I wouldn't look like a complete and total idiot. It was so nice to have the house to myself, to be able to do what I wanted, when I wanted, where I wanted. To fart in peace with no one telling me to spray something........ Ah, heaven.
The cupcakes turned out beautifully and were to die for. I took some over to the girls, called a friend and had some foiled up for her and her son to take home and when Bob did get home he ate one or two (or three). They were good. Rich, chocolate, coffee and cream...... Have mercy!
PAMPERED CHEF PARTIES
Thursday I closed my third party, a catalog show, and Saturday I did my fourth show, a cooking show. I get entirely too excited about these stupid shows. I drag every Pampered Chef thing I own to them and I'm thinking that my Jeep just isn't big enough. I really do have a great time though, it's just so damned fun! I would LOVE to do it full time but I don't sell well, I just love to do it. LOL I know it's expensive, but I love the gadgets, I just do it for me and no one else. My goal is 2 shows a month and I've met my goal this month already so I guess I'm done. We'll see though...... I do have one scheduled for September and one for October already so I am booking up fast!! WOO HOO!
SADNESS VIA CELL PHONE
Mrs. Coach's precious grandma is having some major health concerns. Mrs. C has been texting me all weekend keeping me informed about her status. It ain't good people, if you believe in God, please, please pray. Pray for Grandma and pray for Mrs. C and her family. They're good people, I hate that she's feelin' pain.
PAINTED PRETTINESS
It's taken two months but my office is finally complete! Bob hung my shelf today so I could move the book case and other furniture around and I love it! WOO HOO! He finished the painting behind the book case and took down the ugly blinds so now my office is beautiful and done! I think I'll find some pretty art work and maybe a mirror or a clock for decorations but the major stuff is done! Finally! It's all mine and I love it!!!!!!
*******************************************************
Tomorrow starts the new week and I'm not sure this weekend was long enough. Actually I'm positive it wasn't long enough. I can't complain though because I did what I wanted to, I just wanted to do more than what I had time for. Ah, life.
Tuesday, August 07, 2007
Mystery Blogger suggests Joke Of The Day
A man, standing nude, looks in the bedroom mirror and says to his wife, "I feel horrible, I look fat, ugly and out of shape. Pay me a compliment."
The wife replies, "Your eyesight's damn near perfect."
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Thank you Mystery Blogger, you know how to start a day off RIGHT!
The wife replies, "Your eyesight's damn near perfect."
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Thank you Mystery Blogger, you know how to start a day off RIGHT!
Monday, August 06, 2007
Serious
Two things this weekend are blog worthy......
First, my mother, who is 51, bought a new car. A 2007 Dodge Caliber. It's white and a very nice car and I'm soooooooo proud of her because it's her first new car that she's ever owned. Her last car, a boat, a 2001 (I think) Mercury Marquis, was dying. The air conditioning went out of it and she was having all sorts of problems with it. She's been wanting something else, something that gets about 30 miles per gallon (or more) but she's just unsure of herself and didn't have the nerve to go out and do it. Well last week I took her out to the local Dodge dealer and had her drive a Caliber. She loved it. We took her to the Chevy lot and she drove an Aveo and she hated
it. She really liked the feel and the looks of the Caliber and I do too. I was not prepared though for her to call me Friday night and tell me she had BOUGHT one though.
My mom is bipolar and I worry about her. She takes her meds but she still has episodes where she's manic (high) or depressed (low) and right now she's high. Manic. Her mannerisms are wild, her speech is fast, her mind is racing........ I can barely keep up with her. She's going 90 to nothing fast.
She needs sleep. She's worried about money (who isn't?) and about getting her new car tagged.
I'm worried about her being unable to take care of herself...... Why am I the responsible one? Why does it all fall on me? Why?
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On another front, Curie died. My friend, Cruella, is crushed. She loved her little kitty. It's so sad. She had a stroke while Cruella was out of town and Cruella feels so bad that Curie suffered alone. I feel bad because she feels bad...... Sucks.
****************************************
Friday started the "Back to School" tax break sales here in my neck of the woods. School supplies and clothes are exempt from State taxes. So Saturday we loaded up the Jeep and headed to Springfield, Missouri for some BTS shopping. MWH got some goodies at JC Penney's, Vanity (possibly her new favorite store), Steve & Barry's and I don't even remember where else. LOL I had to stop at Build-A-Bear because I freakin' love BABW. We shopped, we ate, we peed, we walked, we shopped........ My feet hurt, my back ached, my head throbbed....... But we did it. BTS shopping is now over and I'm done. WOO HOO!!!!!!!
Or. So. I. Thought.
Sunday morning after I cooked pancakes for breakfast and after I read my Joplin Globe and Miami News-Record papers, I took the tags off MWH's clothes to wash them only to discover that the idiot clerk at JC Penney's failed to remove one of the anti theft buttons from a pair of LEI jeans. FUCK! I tried to call Springfield's JC Penney's store but they didn't open until 11:00 so I had to wait. I don't wait well. Finally I got ahold of a live human being and here's the conversation:
CLERK: "oooooooooh, it happens all the time........ giggle, tee hee, just bring them back, we'll fix ya right up!"
ME: "But I am in Oklahoma, you're in Springfield, I don't WANT to drive 100 miles for a pair of pants........."
CLERK: "Why did you come here?"
ME: "Does it matter? Look, I just want this damn button OFF these jeans, how do I get it off? I'm NOT driving back to Springfield unless you give me gas money and something for my time, cause it's gonna take me 4 hours for the round trip!"
CLERK: "Oh, well I can offer you a $5 gift card....... um, why don't you go to Joplin's store, they can take off the button. Why didn't you just go there to begin with?"
ME: "Just mail me the damned card...."
So, Sunday, after a breakfast of champions, after enlightening myself with the local news and oodles of sale ads, and after a check up call to my mother to see if she is ok, we headed to Joplin to go back to the mall to get the jeans dealt with.
We hit the mall running....... got the jeans anti theft button removed, stopped at Vanity, Rue 21, DEB, Sears and God knows where else...... Again, I was beat! I swear I'm never going to get to rest. We headed home and went to Wal-Mart for groceries and by the time we got home it was after 4:00 and I was spent. Stick a fork in me, I am done!!
Also, on Saturday, if going to Springfield wasn't enough, we went to The Swimmin' Hole in Joplin for their late night swim. I'm too thin to swim at night anymore. I just can't do it. I froze my ass off. When I was heavier I could do it, but now that I'm not as fat (I'm still overweight, obese even, according to my BMI). I'm too cold now, all the time........ Being thinner has advantages and disadvantages, I'll take them all though, good and bad. Thinner........ That freakin' rocks!
First, my mother, who is 51, bought a new car. A 2007 Dodge Caliber. It's white and a very nice car and I'm soooooooo proud of her because it's her first new car that she's ever owned. Her last car, a boat, a 2001 (I think) Mercury Marquis, was dying. The air conditioning went out of it and she was having all sorts of problems with it. She's been wanting something else, something that gets about 30 miles per gallon (or more) but she's just unsure of herself and didn't have the nerve to go out and do it. Well last week I took her out to the local Dodge dealer and had her drive a Caliber. She loved it. We took her to the Chevy lot and she drove an Aveo and she hated
it. She really liked the feel and the looks of the Caliber and I do too. I was not prepared though for her to call me Friday night and tell me she had BOUGHT one though.My mom is bipolar and I worry about her. She takes her meds but she still has episodes where she's manic (high) or depressed (low) and right now she's high. Manic. Her mannerisms are wild, her speech is fast, her mind is racing........ I can barely keep up with her. She's going 90 to nothing fast.
She needs sleep. She's worried about money (who isn't?) and about getting her new car tagged.
I'm worried about her being unable to take care of herself...... Why am I the responsible one? Why does it all fall on me? Why?
****************************************
On another front, Curie died. My friend, Cruella, is crushed. She loved her little kitty. It's so sad. She had a stroke while Cruella was out of town and Cruella feels so bad that Curie suffered alone. I feel bad because she feels bad...... Sucks.
****************************************
Friday started the "Back to School" tax break sales here in my neck of the woods. School supplies and clothes are exempt from State taxes. So Saturday we loaded up the Jeep and headed to Springfield, Missouri for some BTS shopping. MWH got some goodies at JC Penney's, Vanity (possibly her new favorite store), Steve & Barry's and I don't even remember where else. LOL I had to stop at Build-A-Bear because I freakin' love BABW. We shopped, we ate, we peed, we walked, we shopped........ My feet hurt, my back ached, my head throbbed....... But we did it. BTS shopping is now over and I'm done. WOO HOO!!!!!!!
Or. So. I. Thought.
Sunday morning after I cooked pancakes for breakfast and after I read my Joplin Globe and Miami News-Record papers, I took the tags off MWH's clothes to wash them only to discover that the idiot clerk at JC Penney's failed to remove one of the anti theft buttons from a pair of LEI jeans. FUCK! I tried to call Springfield's JC Penney's store but they didn't open until 11:00 so I had to wait. I don't wait well. Finally I got ahold of a live human being and here's the conversation:
CLERK: "oooooooooh, it happens all the time........ giggle, tee hee, just bring them back, we'll fix ya right up!"
ME: "But I am in Oklahoma, you're in Springfield, I don't WANT to drive 100 miles for a pair of pants........."
CLERK: "Why did you come here?"
ME: "Does it matter? Look, I just want this damn button OFF these jeans, how do I get it off? I'm NOT driving back to Springfield unless you give me gas money and something for my time, cause it's gonna take me 4 hours for the round trip!"
CLERK: "Oh, well I can offer you a $5 gift card....... um, why don't you go to Joplin's store, they can take off the button. Why didn't you just go there to begin with?"
ME: "Just mail me the damned card...."
So, Sunday, after a breakfast of champions, after enlightening myself with the local news and oodles of sale ads, and after a check up call to my mother to see if she is ok, we headed to Joplin to go back to the mall to get the jeans dealt with.
We hit the mall running....... got the jeans anti theft button removed, stopped at Vanity, Rue 21, DEB, Sears and God knows where else...... Again, I was beat! I swear I'm never going to get to rest. We headed home and went to Wal-Mart for groceries and by the time we got home it was after 4:00 and I was spent. Stick a fork in me, I am done!!
Also, on Saturday, if going to Springfield wasn't enough, we went to The Swimmin' Hole in Joplin for their late night swim. I'm too thin to swim at night anymore. I just can't do it. I froze my ass off. When I was heavier I could do it, but now that I'm not as fat (I'm still overweight, obese even, according to my BMI). I'm too cold now, all the time........ Being thinner has advantages and disadvantages, I'll take them all though, good and bad. Thinner........ That freakin' rocks!
Friday, August 03, 2007
conversations with my child
Miss Whineyhiney: Mom, can an oxymoron be a compound word?
Me (mom): Um, sure. (thinking to myself, hello, it's August, school doesn't start for 2 more weeks, WHY are you thinking about this shit?)
Miss Whineyhiney: Well, can you think of any examples?
Me: Ummmmmmm (pause) no. Why, in all that is Holy, are you thinking about this NOW?
Miss Whineyhiney: 'Cause school starts in just 14 days!!!!
Me: OOOOOOOh, how I know kid, how I know......
In addition to oxymorons (which are NOT bleached idiots) we also discussed hyperboles (which are pronounced high-per-bah-lee-s NOT high-per-bowls) and other English topics.
I can't believe my kid will be in 8th grade. Eighth grade. I can barely type it, I still can't say it out loud. She's going to be an office aid this year and she's totally freakin' excited about it too! She is going to take Pre Advanced Placement classes for math, science and English. She'll be pushing it but I think she can do it. I just know she can! I'm so damned proud of her, she's such a great kid!
Me (mom): Um, sure. (thinking to myself, hello, it's August, school doesn't start for 2 more weeks, WHY are you thinking about this shit?)
Miss Whineyhiney: Well, can you think of any examples?
Me: Ummmmmmm (pause) no. Why, in all that is Holy, are you thinking about this NOW?
Miss Whineyhiney: 'Cause school starts in just 14 days!!!!
Me: OOOOOOOh, how I know kid, how I know......
In addition to oxymorons (which are NOT bleached idiots) we also discussed hyperboles (which are pronounced high-per-bah-lee-s NOT high-per-bowls) and other English topics.
I can't believe my kid will be in 8th grade. Eighth grade. I can barely type it, I still can't say it out loud. She's going to be an office aid this year and she's totally freakin' excited about it too! She is going to take Pre Advanced Placement classes for math, science and English. She'll be pushing it but I think she can do it. I just know she can! I'm so damned proud of her, she's such a great kid!
Thursday, August 02, 2007
Thought for the day...
Handle every situation like a canine:
If you can't eat it, play with it, or screw it,
Piss on it and walk away.
If you can't eat it, play with it, or screw it,
Piss on it and walk away.
Monday, July 30, 2007
Introduce Yourself, a meme
1. Ever punch someone in the face? Yes, yes I have
2. How old are you? 35 and I'm not ashamed to admit it
3. Are you single or taken? I'm married, 17 years. Y.E.A.R.S.
4. Eat with your hands or utensils? Both, depends on what I'm eating!
5. Do you dream at night? rarely, I hate to dream, the good ones don't come true.....
6. Ever seen a corpse? Yes, but they've all been embalmed
7. Have you ever wished someone dead? Yes, who hasn't?
8. Do you like Bush, the president? He's the president, I respect him for that. I don't know him personally so I can't say whether or not I actually like him.
9. Whats your philosophy on life and death? Life..... um, well, life is what you make of it. Good, bad or indifferent. Death, it's gonna happen to all of us so why fear it? Live. Die. Go 'bout your business.
10. What do you think about Paris Hilton? She should be put on public display in some form of mid-evil torture device for the entire world to view.
11. Do you trust the police? Trust isn't the word I'd use......
12. Do you like country music? Yeah, it's ok
13. What is your fondest memory of a birthday? I don't really remember birthdays...... obviously none were worth remembering.
14. If you could change anything about yourself what would it be? I'd be filthy rich.
15. Would you be a willing participant in an "Indecent Proposal"? For a million bucks? Sure!
16. What do you wear to sleep? A t-shirt and 'jama bottoms, usually fleece 'cause they're warm......
17. Have you ever peed in a pool? Yes and if you say no I know you're LYING!
18. Would you hide evidence for me if your best friend asked you to? In a heartbeat!
19. If you only had one day to live, what would you want to do? Fly to NY City with my kid and see the sights!
20. What is your favorite thing about work? The paycheck!
21. Do you think you are attractive? Um, no.......
22. What's your favorite color? Purple
23. If you could bring back anyone that has passed, who would it be? JFK
24. Tell me one interesting/odd fact about you? I can bend my fingers in a weird way.
25. Would you ever participate in a reality type of TV show like Survivor or American Idol? Not on your life!
2. How old are you? 35 and I'm not ashamed to admit it
3. Are you single or taken? I'm married, 17 years. Y.E.A.R.S.
4. Eat with your hands or utensils? Both, depends on what I'm eating!
5. Do you dream at night? rarely, I hate to dream, the good ones don't come true.....
6. Ever seen a corpse? Yes, but they've all been embalmed
7. Have you ever wished someone dead? Yes, who hasn't?
8. Do you like Bush, the president? He's the president, I respect him for that. I don't know him personally so I can't say whether or not I actually like him.
9. Whats your philosophy on life and death? Life..... um, well, life is what you make of it. Good, bad or indifferent. Death, it's gonna happen to all of us so why fear it? Live. Die. Go 'bout your business.
10. What do you think about Paris Hilton? She should be put on public display in some form of mid-evil torture device for the entire world to view.
11. Do you trust the police? Trust isn't the word I'd use......
12. Do you like country music? Yeah, it's ok
13. What is your fondest memory of a birthday? I don't really remember birthdays...... obviously none were worth remembering.
14. If you could change anything about yourself what would it be? I'd be filthy rich.
15. Would you be a willing participant in an "Indecent Proposal"? For a million bucks? Sure!
16. What do you wear to sleep? A t-shirt and 'jama bottoms, usually fleece 'cause they're warm......
17. Have you ever peed in a pool? Yes and if you say no I know you're LYING!
18. Would you hide evidence for me if your best friend asked you to? In a heartbeat!
19. If you only had one day to live, what would you want to do? Fly to NY City with my kid and see the sights!
20. What is your favorite thing about work? The paycheck!
21. Do you think you are attractive? Um, no.......
22. What's your favorite color? Purple
23. If you could bring back anyone that has passed, who would it be? JFK
24. Tell me one interesting/odd fact about you? I can bend my fingers in a weird way.
25. Would you ever participate in a reality type of TV show like Survivor or American Idol? Not on your life!
Tuesday, July 24, 2007
Weeeeeeekend bliss
First off, I gotta shout to the world that MY BABY IS HOME!!!!!!
She spent a week at Girl Scout camp doing the CAP thing (working) and loving it. She could live at camp, any camp, if we'd let her and honestly I'd probably let her but I'd miss her too much.
Bob and I spent the week at home. Alone. It was a typical week for the two of us. Those of you who know us know exactly what we did all week, those of you who don't know Bob, well, it wasn't pretty, I won't bore you with the details.
There isn't much to blog about for the week other than I've had a bitch of a fucking headache since the whole tick/stomach virus weekend. Mrs. Coach seems to think I had (and may still have) botulism. Yeah, lovely. How fucking exciting is it to be me?????
So, Saturday was my first Pampered Chef show. I had it at my friend Tess's house. She's wonderful, simply wonderful. There were over 20 people there and we had a fabulous time! I handled the questions like a pro and made a few new friends. A lot of the girls there were also WLS patients that I know online and now I can put a face with a name (or an email address). It's so nice to be able to do that!! The show was a smashing success, we did over $600 in commissionable sales. Most excellent! No one scheduled any parties off Tess's show but there are several ladies who did want to but they needed to get back with me later on dates, that is fine with me! I demonstrated a chicken enchillada ring, which was totally new to me, and it turned out soooooooooo amazingly good. I swear I'm a natural cook! LOL Ok, I'm an idiot who can follow a recipe but still it was spectacular!
After the party we sat in the hot tub and talked and relaxed. I freakin' loved it, I gotta get me one of those........
Sunday Bob and I went to pick up MWH and that was glorious. I don't know what I'll do without that kid....... she can't grow up. I just don't know what I'll do when she turns 18 and becomes independent. She's 13 and I know it's coming. I've tried to get her to start smoking, I've heard it stunts growth, but she's too damned smart.
She got the new Harry Potter book too and she was in H.E.A.V.E.N. Absolute heaven. She has been reading it slowly...... very slowly. Savoring every page. I haven't read anything past the second book so I'm way behind but oh well, that's life.
I did find a new author I've been reading, Mary Kay Andrews, and she's a riot. Very witty and an excellent source of simple chick lit. I love fluff. I don't want to think when I read. I won't be reading any Stephen King or John Grisham anytime soon........ I guarantee you of that. Jodi Picoult, Mary Kay Andrews, Billie Letts, those are my kind of authors.
I hope you all are enjoying the new "joke of the day" posts. I'll try to keep them up as long as people keep sending them to me.
She spent a week at Girl Scout camp doing the CAP thing (working) and loving it. She could live at camp, any camp, if we'd let her and honestly I'd probably let her but I'd miss her too much.
Bob and I spent the week at home. Alone. It was a typical week for the two of us. Those of you who know us know exactly what we did all week, those of you who don't know Bob, well, it wasn't pretty, I won't bore you with the details.
There isn't much to blog about for the week other than I've had a bitch of a fucking headache since the whole tick/stomach virus weekend. Mrs. Coach seems to think I had (and may still have) botulism. Yeah, lovely. How fucking exciting is it to be me?????
So, Saturday was my first Pampered Chef show. I had it at my friend Tess's house. She's wonderful, simply wonderful. There were over 20 people there and we had a fabulous time! I handled the questions like a pro and made a few new friends. A lot of the girls there were also WLS patients that I know online and now I can put a face with a name (or an email address). It's so nice to be able to do that!! The show was a smashing success, we did over $600 in commissionable sales. Most excellent! No one scheduled any parties off Tess's show but there are several ladies who did want to but they needed to get back with me later on dates, that is fine with me! I demonstrated a chicken enchillada ring, which was totally new to me, and it turned out soooooooooo amazingly good. I swear I'm a natural cook! LOL Ok, I'm an idiot who can follow a recipe but still it was spectacular!
After the party we sat in the hot tub and talked and relaxed. I freakin' loved it, I gotta get me one of those........
Sunday Bob and I went to pick up MWH and that was glorious. I don't know what I'll do without that kid....... she can't grow up. I just don't know what I'll do when she turns 18 and becomes independent. She's 13 and I know it's coming. I've tried to get her to start smoking, I've heard it stunts growth, but she's too damned smart.
She got the new Harry Potter book too and she was in H.E.A.V.E.N. Absolute heaven. She has been reading it slowly...... very slowly. Savoring every page. I haven't read anything past the second book so I'm way behind but oh well, that's life.
I did find a new author I've been reading, Mary Kay Andrews, and she's a riot. Very witty and an excellent source of simple chick lit. I love fluff. I don't want to think when I read. I won't be reading any Stephen King or John Grisham anytime soon........ I guarantee you of that. Jodi Picoult, Mary Kay Andrews, Billie Letts, those are my kind of authors.
I hope you all are enjoying the new "joke of the day" posts. I'll try to keep them up as long as people keep sending them to me.
Little Joe and the mortgage
For his birthday, little Joe asked for a 10-speed bicycle.
His father said, "Son, we'd give you one, but the mortgage on this house is $280,000 & your mother just lost her job. There's no way we can afford it."
The next day the father saw little Joe heading out the front door with a suitcase. So he asked, "Son, where are you going?"
Little Joe told him; "I was walking past your room last night and heard you telling Mom you were pulling out. Then I heard her tell you to wait because she was coming too. And I'll be damned if I'm staying here by myself with a $280,000 mortgage & no bike.
His father said, "Son, we'd give you one, but the mortgage on this house is $280,000 & your mother just lost her job. There's no way we can afford it."
The next day the father saw little Joe heading out the front door with a suitcase. So he asked, "Son, where are you going?"
Little Joe told him; "I was walking past your room last night and heard you telling Mom you were pulling out. Then I heard her tell you to wait because she was coming too. And I'll be damned if I'm staying here by myself with a $280,000 mortgage & no bike.
Monday, July 23, 2007
Poor Baby....
Minutes after a woman gave birth to her baby, her doctor stood solemnly at her bedside and said: "I have something I must tell you about your baby."
"What's wrong?," the alarmed mother asked.
"Your baby is a hermaphrodite."
"What's that?"
"It means your baby has both male and female parts."
"Oh, my goodness, that's wonderful!," the woman exclaimed. "You mean it has a penis and a brain? That doesn't happen often, does it?!"
"What's wrong?," the alarmed mother asked.
"Your baby is a hermaphrodite."
"What's that?"
"It means your baby has both male and female parts."
"Oh, my goodness, that's wonderful!," the woman exclaimed. "You mean it has a penis and a brain? That doesn't happen often, does it?!"
Thursday, July 19, 2007
High School Musical
Ok, stole this from Mrs. Coach who I'm sure stole it from someone else who got it from someone else. You know how it works. It's a meme, should be pronounced me-me because it's well, all about me but however you say, here it is:
1. Who was your best friend? Hmmmmm, which school do I want to meme about? I went to two. In Baxter, it was Terra, always Terra. I ran with a lot of different crowds, Darren, Brad, Heather, Laura, Pebble, AnnMarie........ But my true friend was always Terra. Her dad was an alcoholic, my dad was (and still is) a sorry son of a bitch mother fucker, so we never spent the night at each other's houses and we really didn't run around with each other much outside of school, but we were buds and we still are to this day. In Quapaw, I didn't really have a "best" friend, just lots of different people. I was with Tish when I met Randy and his crew, I liked Angie a lot but her boyfriend frowned on her having any friends other than him so it was hard to be friends with her.
2. What sports did you play? Um, does quarters count? I rocked at quarters....... yeah, rocked.
3. What kind of car did you drive? My first car was a 1975 Chevy Monte Carlo, it was awesome, you didn't need a key, it idled at 15 to 20 miles per hour and could climb hills. It died and I had a 1982 Chevy Impala (totally hated it), a 1969 Dodge Coronet and then a 1978 Datsun B210. I loved the Datsun. LOVED!!!!!! It was a total piece of shit but it got great gas mileage (I know you remember getting 78 cents of gas and it actually got you somewhere!!) and I could scratch in any gear.
4. It's Friday Night, where were you? At a football game or in Miami draggin' Main. Sometimes both. Always, though, always, I was having a great time and I pretty much always had alcohol.
5. Were you a party animal? Yep, been there, done that.
6. Were you considered a flirt? No, I wasn't. I was the girl you told your girlfriend that you were going out and I was always the "reason" for the break up but in reality it wasn't true. I was the one who had the condoms or would make the rubber run but I just didn't want to be involved with anyone. I had my crushes and they were safe and right there and I just kept my distance......
7. Were you in band, orchestra or choir? At Baxter I wasn't in anything, at Quapaw I was in band. I always wanted to play the sax...... ah, the smooth sound....... thanks for those memories Brad....... but I didn't have the money to play an instrument. At Quapaw though I was in the band, I played cymbals *hence the nickname of Clash* and the bass drum. I was usually the only sober person at parades so I'd be the one carrying the big bass drum around.
8. Were you a nerd? Nope. Not. One. Bit.
9. Did you get expelled or suspended? Yeah, does that matter? Why do you think I went to two different high schools?
10. Can you sing the fight song? Sing it, ummmm I don't recall ever having one at either school!
11. Who was your favorite teacher? In Baxter it was probably Mr. Dillon, he just knew things...... Maybe Mrs. Binns too, she was amazingly narcoleptic (sp?). At Quapaw, I liked our science teacher, something Mrs. B..... Barrett maybe....... damn, my brain hurts. I liked Mrs. Rhodes (shhhh, don't tell anyone, she was a real bitch). Oh and I ADORED Mrs. Chrisman, she freakin' rocked!
12. What was your school mascot? Baxter Lions (red and white) and Quapaw Wildcats (green and white)
13. Did you go to the prom? My freshman or sophmore year I went to Riverton's prom, big freakin' nightmare. My Junior year I went to Miami and Quapaw and then my Senior year I didn't get invited. Looooooong story.
14. If you could go back and do it over again would you? Yeah, I would. In a New York minute.
15. What do you remember most about graduation? Wearing heels and worrying about tripping over the electrical cords. How fucking hot it was. How they refused to move me to the "C" section rather than keep me in the "R" section, dammit, I was married now!
16. Where were you on Senior Skip day? Um, skipping........ I skipped a lot. I actually skipped my entire second semester my senior year so every day was Senior Skip day to me!
17. Did you have a job Senior year? I worked at McD's but I cut my hand (at home, not at work) and I couldn't work for a while so I quit. Then after Christmas I did work because I was out of school and it was expected of me.... damn reality of life.
18. Where did you go most for lunch? The Quapaw Express or Dallas' Dairyette. Yumooooooo!
19. Have you gained weight since then? Gained and lost. I'm about 10 pounds heavier than I was when I left Baxter.
20. What did you do after graduation? Went home and got drunk, I was married and could do whatever I wanted to. Sort of. LOL
21. When did you graduate? May of 1990, I don't remember the date.
22. Who was your Senior prom date? I didn't go. I didn't get invited. I don't wanna talk about it.
23. Are you going/did you go to your 10th reunion? Didn't go, didn't have one.
24. Who was your homeroom teacher? We didn't have homeroom, there were only 40 or so of us at Quapaw, if you weren't there everyone already knew it and why. LOL
25. Who will repost this? YOU! Go ahead, just do it!
1. Who was your best friend? Hmmmmm, which school do I want to meme about? I went to two. In Baxter, it was Terra, always Terra. I ran with a lot of different crowds, Darren, Brad, Heather, Laura, Pebble, AnnMarie........ But my true friend was always Terra. Her dad was an alcoholic, my dad was (and still is) a sorry son of a bitch mother fucker, so we never spent the night at each other's houses and we really didn't run around with each other much outside of school, but we were buds and we still are to this day. In Quapaw, I didn't really have a "best" friend, just lots of different people. I was with Tish when I met Randy and his crew, I liked Angie a lot but her boyfriend frowned on her having any friends other than him so it was hard to be friends with her.
2. What sports did you play? Um, does quarters count? I rocked at quarters....... yeah, rocked.
3. What kind of car did you drive? My first car was a 1975 Chevy Monte Carlo, it was awesome, you didn't need a key, it idled at 15 to 20 miles per hour and could climb hills. It died and I had a 1982 Chevy Impala (totally hated it), a 1969 Dodge Coronet and then a 1978 Datsun B210. I loved the Datsun. LOVED!!!!!! It was a total piece of shit but it got great gas mileage (I know you remember getting 78 cents of gas and it actually got you somewhere!!) and I could scratch in any gear.
4. It's Friday Night, where were you? At a football game or in Miami draggin' Main. Sometimes both. Always, though, always, I was having a great time and I pretty much always had alcohol.
5. Were you a party animal? Yep, been there, done that.
6. Were you considered a flirt? No, I wasn't. I was the girl you told your girlfriend that you were going out and I was always the "reason" for the break up but in reality it wasn't true. I was the one who had the condoms or would make the rubber run but I just didn't want to be involved with anyone. I had my crushes and they were safe and right there and I just kept my distance......
7. Were you in band, orchestra or choir? At Baxter I wasn't in anything, at Quapaw I was in band. I always wanted to play the sax...... ah, the smooth sound....... thanks for those memories Brad....... but I didn't have the money to play an instrument. At Quapaw though I was in the band, I played cymbals *hence the nickname of Clash* and the bass drum. I was usually the only sober person at parades so I'd be the one carrying the big bass drum around.
8. Were you a nerd? Nope. Not. One. Bit.
9. Did you get expelled or suspended? Yeah, does that matter? Why do you think I went to two different high schools?
10. Can you sing the fight song? Sing it, ummmm I don't recall ever having one at either school!
11. Who was your favorite teacher? In Baxter it was probably Mr. Dillon, he just knew things...... Maybe Mrs. Binns too, she was amazingly narcoleptic (sp?). At Quapaw, I liked our science teacher, something Mrs. B..... Barrett maybe....... damn, my brain hurts. I liked Mrs. Rhodes (shhhh, don't tell anyone, she was a real bitch). Oh and I ADORED Mrs. Chrisman, she freakin' rocked!
12. What was your school mascot? Baxter Lions (red and white) and Quapaw Wildcats (green and white)
13. Did you go to the prom? My freshman or sophmore year I went to Riverton's prom, big freakin' nightmare. My Junior year I went to Miami and Quapaw and then my Senior year I didn't get invited. Looooooong story.
14. If you could go back and do it over again would you? Yeah, I would. In a New York minute.
15. What do you remember most about graduation? Wearing heels and worrying about tripping over the electrical cords. How fucking hot it was. How they refused to move me to the "C" section rather than keep me in the "R" section, dammit, I was married now!
16. Where were you on Senior Skip day? Um, skipping........ I skipped a lot. I actually skipped my entire second semester my senior year so every day was Senior Skip day to me!
17. Did you have a job Senior year? I worked at McD's but I cut my hand (at home, not at work) and I couldn't work for a while so I quit. Then after Christmas I did work because I was out of school and it was expected of me.... damn reality of life.
18. Where did you go most for lunch? The Quapaw Express or Dallas' Dairyette. Yumooooooo!
19. Have you gained weight since then? Gained and lost. I'm about 10 pounds heavier than I was when I left Baxter.
20. What did you do after graduation? Went home and got drunk, I was married and could do whatever I wanted to. Sort of. LOL
21. When did you graduate? May of 1990, I don't remember the date.
22. Who was your Senior prom date? I didn't go. I didn't get invited. I don't wanna talk about it.
23. Are you going/did you go to your 10th reunion? Didn't go, didn't have one.
24. Who was your homeroom teacher? We didn't have homeroom, there were only 40 or so of us at Quapaw, if you weren't there everyone already knew it and why. LOL
25. Who will repost this? YOU! Go ahead, just do it!
Tuesday, July 17, 2007
Not dead
Damn near wish I were though.
Life's shit.
Wish I could enter the witness protection agency or something, start fresh.
I need a vacation.
I need a break from reality.
I need something.
Panic attacks are happening again, can't make the pong stop.
Work is the only thing keeping me sane.
Life's shit.
Wish I could enter the witness protection agency or something, start fresh.
I need a vacation.
I need a break from reality.
I need something.
Panic attacks are happening again, can't make the pong stop.
Work is the only thing keeping me sane.
Friday, July 13, 2007
Friday
It's Friday and I wish I could tell you I'm better but I'm not.
I'm still
*weak
*tired
*sore
*achey
*suffering from a headache
*miserable
and 14 other things that I don't feel like writing right now.
I am at work though, have been since Thursday (yesterday) and will be again Monday as long as the blood remains inside my body.
Bob and MWH are both fine, this must not be contageous 'cause they ain't got it. I wonder if I did get tick bit. How? Where? Will I die? Soon?
Last night, I should have gone to bed immediately after work but I didn't. I took my precious, wonderful teen child to see the new Harry Potter movie. Yeah, stupid. My body ached and I froze during the whole movie. A kid, nay, a hell spawn in the form on a blonde toddler, was tormenting me the entire movie. I caught myself no less than 3 times licking my fingers hoping to touch the little demon brat in hopes that he or she (I have no idea, damn shape shifting children) would become violently ill from this mystery illness I have been subjected to. My plan didn't work, the damn little monster never got close enough........
I will be sleeping all weekend though. Check back Monday to see if I'm dead or not.
I'm still
*weak
*tired
*sore
*achey
*suffering from a headache
*miserable
and 14 other things that I don't feel like writing right now.
I am at work though, have been since Thursday (yesterday) and will be again Monday as long as the blood remains inside my body.
Bob and MWH are both fine, this must not be contageous 'cause they ain't got it. I wonder if I did get tick bit. How? Where? Will I die? Soon?
Last night, I should have gone to bed immediately after work but I didn't. I took my precious, wonderful teen child to see the new Harry Potter movie. Yeah, stupid. My body ached and I froze during the whole movie. A kid, nay, a hell spawn in the form on a blonde toddler, was tormenting me the entire movie. I caught myself no less than 3 times licking my fingers hoping to touch the little demon brat in hopes that he or she (I have no idea, damn shape shifting children) would become violently ill from this mystery illness I have been subjected to. My plan didn't work, the damn little monster never got close enough........
I will be sleeping all weekend though. Check back Monday to see if I'm dead or not.
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